AUTHOR: LAURIE PINKINS
'tis the season to stop over-giving
Learn the how to be a cheerful giver without over-giving
Do you enjoy seeing others happy? Are you a person who gives from your heart? Have you ever felt depleted or unappreciated after giving? In this article, we will discuss how to become a cheerful giver, without falling into over-giving.
“Give unto the LORD the glory due unto His name: bring an offering, and come into His courts.” Psalm 96:8 KJV
What is Over-Giving?
Oftentimes over-givers don’t actually realize they are practicing this self-defeating behavior. They believe they are just helping others out and provide solutions to unanswered questions. An over-giver tends to insert themselves into other people’s problems. Thus, resulting in them feeling depleted and overwhelmed, because of over exertion. This is due to them having an underlined need to find their self-worth in the affirmation of others based upon what they can give.
“Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for GOD loveth a cheerful giver.”
2 Corinthians 9:7 KJV
The act of over-giving is compulsively giving too much even at the expense of your own resources and well being. This act may or may not be asked for by the recipient of the gifts. These efforts are made with the expectation of receiving something or a gesture in return. Boundaries and self-respect are often not held in any regard. You give and give in the hopes of being accepted and affirmed by others. However, your efforts are rarely reciprocated sufficiently, because your true intentions are not revealed when giving. This is due to the underlying lack of self-worth. You feel as if your worth is found in how you give. Based upon the true intent of the act of over-giving. It is imperative to find your identity outside of how you give to others.
Reasons you Over-Give
People-Pleasing
You care about whether other people like you and base your decisions upon their approval of your actions.
Lack of Self-worth
You do not hold yourself in high regard and place the value of others higher than yourself.
Low Self-Esteem
You lack confidence about who you are and your capabilities. Despite having the ability to perform at a high level.
Pride
You believe you alone have the ability to fix everyone’s problems. You are not able to receive and refuse constructive criticism about the detrimental ramifications of your over-giving.
Manipulation
You are being unfairly controlled or influenced by individuals who seek to take advantage of your desire to give.
Bad Habit
Over-giving may also be a habit you assimilated to by watching others around you engage in this behavior (i.e. parents or close relatives).
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A cheerful giver is a person with pure intentions behind their giving.
Pair your daily affirmations with scriptures of the Bible.
Become a Cheerful Giver
A cheerful giver is a person with pure intentions behind their giving. They have no hidden motives or agenda to gain an emotional response from the recipient. When a person gives cheerful, their heart’s desire is to truly see others happy. Despite, how it makes them feel. Their giving is thoughtful and without the depletion of resources to meet their needs. However, there may be times when GOD instructs you to sacrifice your resources in giving to others. It may be uncomfortable or require more effort outside your normal giving. In these instances, it is imperative to follow the leading and guiding of Holy Spirit in how and what you give.
Becoming a cheerful giver requires you to change your mindset from scarcity. Into a mindset of abundance and prosperity. You will need to gain an understanding within the scriptures of the Bible about how GOD provides for His children. In order for you to become a cheerful giver.
Example Scriptures:
- “The earth is the Lord‘s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.” Psalm 24:1
- “For the Lord God is a sun and shield: the Lord will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly.” Psalm 84:11
- “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” John 10:10
Scriptures for Giving
“Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the
will of GOD from the heart;"
Ephesians 6:6 KJV
There is power in speaking and meditating on the scriptures of the Bible daily. Read, speak, and meditate on the scriptures for giving.
Next Steps
Find support from a therapist, life coach, trusted friend, or support group that can help you to become a cheerful giver.
Use the following steps to become a cheerful giver:
- Have pure motives and intentions in your giving
- Be joyful as you give
- Have a heart after GOD in the reasons and methods of your giving
- Set a budget and boundaries
- Give from the enjoyment of seeing others happy
- Do not expect anything in return with hidden intentions
Read, speak, and meditate on these scriptures for giving.
Psalm 96:8- “Give unto the LORD the glory due unto His name: bring an offering, and come into His courts.”
Luke 6:38- “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.”
2 Corinthians 9:7- “Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for GOD loveth a cheerful giver.”
Proverbs 4:23- “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”
Ephesians 6:6- “Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of GOD from the heart;”
Matthew 6:33- “But seek ye first the kingdom of GOD, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”
Philippians 4:19- “But my GOD shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”
1 Corinthians 13:3- “And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.”
Acts 20:35-
“I have shewed you all things, how that so labouring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
Matthew 6:2-4- “Therefore when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth: That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret Himself shall reward thee openly.
Do you struggle with feelings of low self-esteem or over-giving? Want to transform your life today? Get your free consultation with a Life Transformation coach to start the journey to become a cheerful giver!
To another faith by the same Spirit; to another the gifts of healing by the same Spirit;
1 Corinthians 12:9 KJV
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