AUTHOR: LAURIE PINKINS
How to COMBAT
the HOLIDAY BLUES
Learn how to allow HOLY SPIRIT to be your Comforter to overcome feelings of loneliness during the holiday season.
Do you find yourself feeling down during the holiday season? Have difficulty engaging in the holiday festivities? Overwhelming feelings of loneliness, emotional distance or alienated from family and friends? You may be experiencing the holiday blues.
“I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.” John 14:18
What are the Holiday Blues?
The holiday season can cause high emotions and demands. Even with the feelings of love and joy in the air, the holiday blues can sneak up on you. The increased financial obligations, time constraints, and expectations to attend holiday parties, require more of you. As result, you may experience periodic or persistent feelings of overwhelming stress, depression, exhaustion and loneliness. Theses are symptoms of the holiday blues.
The holiday blues will cause you to feel emotionally distant and lonely, even in a room full of people. These feelings of loneliness originate from:
- Unrealistic expectations
- Financial stress
- Emotional distance
- Disappointments
- Alienation from friends and family
- Isolation
“And I will pray the FATHER, and HE shall give you another Comforter, that HE may abide with you for ever;” John 14:16
Allow HOLY SPIRIT to comfort you to combat the feelings of the holiday blues. When you are alienated from your relatives, the holidays may not be the best time to address the issues. Come to terms with the fact that there may be temporary circumstances for distance in your relationships. Although you desire to keep with family traditions around the holidays or avoid being alone. Healing relationships with your relatives requires dedication in creating new and healthy interactions.
Change your mind frame from focusing on trying to be affirmed by others. Stay away from attending holiday events where you feel isolated and alienated. Or people-please by over-spending to buy gifts for others. In order to feel accepted or avoid being alone. Self-reflect on how you can improve your interactions with positive behaviors. You are only responsible for how you present yourself. Circumvent your focus on changing the behavior of others. You cannot control anyone else’s behavior. However, you can decide how you combat the symptoms of the holiday blues, by choosing to use healthy coping skills.
Healthy Coping Skills for the Holiday Blues
Try new things. Step outside of your comfort zone to interact with individuals with different interests. Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable in new environments, to help you overcome the feelings of loneliness. Remaining in the same environments where you feel lonely, emotional distance or alienated, will not bring change. You cannot continue in the same pattern of behavior or holiday traditions and expect different results. New environments and friends, may be just the change of course that you need to help combat the holiday blues.
Avoid feeling shame and people-pleasing. Be mindful not to fall into people-pleasing and over committing to attend holiday events to avoid being alone. The desire to want to be accepted is a human emotion. There is no need to feel shame toward yourself for wanting to be around individuals who value you. However, relinquish the codependency on the validation from others. Develop a healthy balance of acceptance, without seeking the validation of others to affirm you. Pray and ask GOD for the discernment for which holiday festivities you should attend.
Know your worth. Combating the holiday blues, starts with you knowing your worth. It is imperative to master the art of evaluating your emotions. This is due to sometimes, the feeling of loneliness is due to self isolation. After continued disappointments you gave up and decided to no longer attend holiday festivities. As a result, you isolated yourself. However, you were socializing with individuals who did not value you. They disrespected you because you did not realize your value. Once you know your worth and value to be respected. You will avoid holiday festivities where you feel isolated, emotional distant or alienated. Regardless of holiday traditions, you will set boundaries with yourself and others to no longer allow disrespect.
Set boundaries for the holiday season. Boundaries start with setting realistic expectations for what you desire during the holiday season. This includes
- Adhering to values and beliefs
- Spending budget for gifts
- Maintaining holiday schedules
- Limiting commitments to attend holiday festivities
- Balancing work events and family gatherings
- Staying true to commitments
- Relinquishing people-pleasing in an effort to avoid being alone
When you adhere to your own boundaries, you will set boundaries on how you allow others to treat you. Regardless of holiday traditions, you will not remain in spaces where you feel emotional distant, isolated or alienated.
Celebrate yourself. Yes, it is ok to buy yourself a gift. Create the holiday setting you would like to celebrate with others, and celebrate by yourself. Feel free to invite others. However, avoid people-pleasing. Focus on what you want to experience during the holiday seasons. If you feel emotionally distance, isolated, or alienated, when you attend a holiday event, respectfully decline the invitation and throw own holiday party.
Give back. Volunteer during the holiday season to give back to a local organization within your community.
10 Scriptures for Loneliness
“I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.” John 14:18 KJV
The healing process to overcome loneliness, can be complex. However, sustainable healing is possible with GOD. There is power in speaking and meditating on the scriptures of the Bible daily. Read, speak, and meditate on the 10 scriptures for HOLY SPIRIT to be your Comforter.
HOLY SPIRIT is the Comforter
Acknowledge the presence of HOLY SPIRIT. The feeling of loneliness will begin to dissipate, once you realize you will have HOLY SPIRIT as the Comforter with you at all times. You will start to see the loneliness was triggered by memories from holiday festivities where you experienced emotional distance, alienation, and isolation. Although, you experienced these occurrences. You can choose a healthy way to cope with the holiday blues. When you feel loneliness try to sneak up on you, pray and ask HOLY SPIRIT to comfort you. HIS presence will begin to feel all the empty places in you and reveal the true source of your emotions.
Allow HOLY SPIRIT to be your Comforter. The feeling of loneliness is false. It is triggered from previous disappointments, harsh words and actions toward you from individuals who did not value you. Even if you choose to celebrate the holidays alone, from the outside looking in, it may appear you are alone. However, you are not alone, HOLY SPIRIT dwells within you. HE is the Comforter. It is understandable to look outwardly for acceptance from those you love, with family interactions, companionship, and friendships. However, this is the source of the false feeling of loneliness. You are looking outwardly for things that are already on the inside of you. Acknowledge the presence of HOLY SPIRIT within you. Invite HIM into your heart, to be your Comforter and you will overcome the feelings of loneliness.
You need HOLY SPIRIT to be your Comforter. When you feel lonely, pray to ask HOLY SPIRIT to comfort you. Invite HIM into your heart and HIS love will comfort you. The holiday blues will have no place in your heart or mind, because you are not alone. HOLY SPIRIT dwells within you and is your Comforter.
Next Steps
GOD desires for you to be comforted by HOLY SPIRIT. Pray and ask HOLY SPIRIT to be the Comforter in your heart and mind. Use these steps to overcome feelings of loneliness and combat the holiday blues.
Use the following steps to overcome feelings of loneliness and combat the holiday blues.
- Try new things
- Avoid feeling shame and people-pleasing
- Know your worth
- Set boundaries
- Celebrate yourself
- Give back
Read, speak and meditate on the 10 scriptures of the Bible for loneliness.
- John 14:16 “And I will pray the FATHER, and HE shall give you another Comforter, that HE may abide with you for ever;”
- John 14:26 “But the Comforter, which is the HOLY GHOST, whom the FATHER will send in MY name, HE shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.”
- John 15:26 “But when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the SPIRIT of truth, which proceedeth from the FATHER, HE shall testify of me:”
- John 16:7 “Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you.”
- Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the SPIRIT is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”
- 2 Corinthians 3:17 “Now the LORD is that SPIRIT: and where the SPIRIT of the LORD is, there is liberty.”
- John 4:24 “GOD is a SPIRIT: and they that worship HIM must worship HIM in spirit and in truth.”
- Galatians 5:16 “This I say then, Walk in the SPIRIT, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.”
- Ephesians 6:18 “Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the SPIRIT, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;”
- Romans 8:26 “Likewise the SPIRIT also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the SPIRIT itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.”
Are you having difficulty with feeling down during the holiday season? Want to transform your life today. Get your free consultation with a Life Transformation & Healing coach to start the journey healing.
And the people, when they knew it, followed HIM: and HE received them, and spake unto them of the kingdom of GOD, and healed them that had need of healing.
Luke 9:11 KJV
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